How to deal with disappointment?
There have been a couple of little bumps in the road of 2017. I will show you one of them. My little girl dropped my brand-new iPhone 6 onto the floor, and smashed the screen on New Year’s day, which wasn’t a good thing. Had a little bit of barney with my husband on New Year’s day also, not fab.
It got me thinking…
I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves.
We put a lot of pressure on ourselves at the start of the New Year, to have things be perfect, and to start things the way that we mean for it to go. I think that particularly, in the type of environment we surround ourselves in, and, the people that surround us in our environment, we’re always looking for signs, aren’t we? It’s a sign from the universe… If something goes wrong we immediately think to ourselves, is this a sign that I’m on the wrong path?
It’s interesting.. I think that there’s a really fine line between things flowing with ease and grace, and just when we’re really (really in alignment), I think, that I do believe that things should come easily to us.
I don’t believe that everything should feel like a struggle and everything should feel like a challenge.
However, we are human beings, living a very human experience.
I think that it’s unrealistic.. I think that it’s an incredibly tall order for ourselves, no matter how far down we are in the spiritual path. No matter how far down we are in terms of accepting who we are, and loving life, and living with joy, to expect nothing bad to ever happen. To expect us to never be challenged.
Normally we’re disappointed when something doesn’t pan out the way that we think that it is going to pan out. I don’t want you to freak out if things don’t happen exactly when you expect them to happen.
I don’t want you to immediately jump to, “This is a sign from the universe I’m on the wrong path!”
Potentially acknowledge where you might be a little bit out of alignment, with what it is that you are expecting.
But mainly do not worry….
Just chill the FUCK out.
AND this comes down to really, really knowing that your big vision, your big goal… for who you want to be, how you want to show up in the world, what you want to achieve, is happening.
It is on… It is going to happen… We might not know when. We might not know how it’s going to manifest but it is happening.
It’s completely fine!!
When we get interrupted by annoying little bumps in the roads, they are signposts for us to really tune into the bigger picture.
Release and let go… the frustration and the annoyance..
At SOME point you have to choose whether you want to sit in that frustration and annoyance. Whether you want to continue to lash out at the person, who has not acted in the way that you’ve wanted them to act. You want to continue to flagellate yourself, but for not being more productive, more focused, more this, more that..
Just accept that the thing didn’t happen the way that you intended it to.
That acceptance can be, well, just liberating.
It’s like.. okay my daughter dropped my phone on the floor. Does this mean that the whole of 2017.. the whole thing is going to be shot to fuck? Is this an omen for 2017? Or is it just one little thing?
I’ve got little affirmations on my phone that pop up every hour, and that was one just popping up. Is the whole year going to be shot to fuck or is this just a little thing that tells me that I need to get back into alignment?
I like to acknowledge, release, let go, and then raise the vibe…
So, what do I do???
I, for one, refocus on what the big vision is…
What the big vision is for me…
What my big goals are…
Refocus on how I want to feel at the end of the year, or the end of when I have achieved my goal, whatever that goal is…
Then I bring it back to the present.
What can I do right now?
Often there is some kind of forgiveness involved. I’m going to forgive my daughter for dropping my phone. I’m going forgive myself for leaving it there. I’m going to forgive myself for being so obsessed by it.
Doing something that makes you feel good… (and often for me, that is getting out and going for a walk.)
I have to get that affirmation in there.. that everything is always working out for me.
All I want you to take away from my post is that shit happens, it’s okay.
It doesn’t have to be a sign that we are on the wrong path. I think that if shit is continuously happening and we’re really struggling on a day-to-day basis, that is a sign. We shouldn’t ignore it. When you have these one-off little bumps in the road, it’s like, okay where can I get back into alignment.
Do I need to forgive anybody? Do I need to forgive myself? How do I raise my vibe? The whole time, underneath all of this, is the need for affirmation that everything is always working out for me. And a strong sense of knowing that if I show up for myself every day, in the way that I want to show up, and if I align myself with the bigger vision I have for who I want to be, I will get what I want.
It’s all there….
This little bump in the road is nothing to knock me off, knock me off my track.
We’ve got it all to come and 99%… 99.99% of what happens to us, the way we respond to what happens to us will dictate how easy it is for us to get to where we want to go.
I just try to keep beating it all back with my positivity stick.
You know what, I’m a big believer in the power of positivity but I also think that we have to acknowledge where we are and sometimes, when we are feeling depressed, lonely, and sad it’s really difficult for us to jump, to be happy, or be joyful. Sometimes just reaching for the next best thought or feeling is much more helpful, because when we try to kind of do this big leap, we end up beating ourselves up, that we keep falling back to depression and anxiety, and being fucked off.
Just going for the next feeling, and then the next one, and then the next one. Slowly we work ourselves back up to that space of joy and happiness.