The fear of leaving people behind as you uplevel
I have a question for you…
Do you surround yourself with people that are involved in personal (and professional, or spiritual) development?
My guess is that you have at least someone in your life who doesn’t quite understand that part of you.
I can be partners, it can be parents, it can be friends… and it can vary from ‘I don’t know what you’re going on about, but if you’re happy, I’m happy’, to ‘I’m a bit worried about you’.
Their opinion matters to you, right? And it’s difficult to hear that they don’t get your path. I truly believe that everyone experiences this a little when they step into this space. And what happens is, you start to worry about losing people. You might even start to question whether you are doing the right thing. But for sure, you will experience some sort of fear around losing significant people in your life.
You probably feel torn between the old you – the one who wouldn’t think twice about staying up later to have a glass of wine, and the new you, who has to decline the offer because they’d rather be up early ready to smash their goals. I get it. I’ve been there.
Now, I’m not there today to tell you how you can win those people over, get them on side and live happily ever after. Unfortunately it doesn’t work like that. But I am here to advise you on what to do.
Acknowledge the triggers
First, you need to realise where their fear is coming from. It’s probably a fear of losing you, too. They see you evolving and expanding and they’re worried that one day you’ll be too big for them. In short, they’re triggered. There’s a part of them – even if they are happy for you – that wants to keep the status quo, i.e. keep you in your place, the place you’ve always been. But what’s more is this: often, the people that are close to you are reflecting what is actually inside of you. Your fear. Fear that your dreams are too big, fear that everything you desire if unattainable, fear that you don’t deserve it. So the first point is to acknowledge the fact that they are triggered, but also to acknowledge that you are too!
Decide what you are committed to
Next up you need to desire what it is that you want, above all else. Decide what you are committed to. You have to be committed to stepping into your highest potential. You have to believe that you are capable of achieving the highest possible vision that you have for yourself. Why? Because you put out there is what you will receive back. So, it’s time to start acting in alignment with everything that you want.
Decide what you are prepared to tolerate.
Finally, decide what you are willing to put up with. You have to embody someone who knows what she wants and will not compromise. And that might mean saying goodbye to some people. Now, I’m telling you to start cutting ties with the people close to you, but this is about acceptance that IF (not when) certain people drift away, it is meant to be. Sometimes people who don’t get it right now will in the future, but it is not your job to change them. I’ve had people go away and come back. But I truly believe that everyone is in our life for a reason, even if only for a season. So, I suppose what I’m asking of you here is to decide what you will accept, and then step into trust. Trust that what’s meant for you won’t pass you by.
So there we have it. Choose what it is that you desire to create in this world, choose who it is that you desire to be and trust you can allow people to walk alongside you without you trying to determine what their path should be, knowing that when people drop away, it is supposed to be.
I hope you got some value out of this, and if that is the case I’d love to hear it! Just comment below and let me know your thoughts.
Also – if you haven’t already, be sure to join The Quantum Success Hub for Female Entrepreneurs where you can be surrounded by people who are working on their expansion just like you.
All the love,
Faith + Action = Miracles