As a coach, a woman, as someone who holds space for many people, I know it’s our intrinsic, innate desire is to make everybody else feel happy.
But the reality is it’s inevitable that you are going to disappoint people.
So how do you deal with that feeling when you know that you have disappointed someone?
Here’s my thoughts…
The fear of disappointing people
I think for me, how I am dealing with that is to accept that it is part of life. I also know that sometimes doing the right thing by me, means that another person is going to feel like I have done the wrong thing by them.
And that’s the real acceptance piece of knowing and dealing with the consequences of when you choose to put yourself first. Or are you always that person who is willing to put others before your own needs? And what do those consequences look like?
Being selfish has a lot of negative connotations but being selfish is also not what somebody is going to be a hundred percent at the time. And I would also encourage you to examine the stories and the meanings you put behind the word selfish.
As mothers, even daughters, sisters, brothers, bosses etc all of the roles that we play, a lot of the time you are going to be putting other people’s needs before your own. And it’s really, really difficult knowing that you are upsetting or disappointing people because of that. So when does it get to be okay to be selfish?
Regardless of the idea that putting yourself first means you are selfish, greedy, unkind etc with some of the decisions that I have made, I have ultimately said to myself, yes I am willing to be perceived in that way.
It is impossible to go through life making everybody else happy. Here is your permission slip to disappoint somebody because you want to put yourself first and you don’t need any other reason than that. It’s okay to put yourself first. It’s okay to disappoint people.
Faith + Action = Miracles x
If you want to check out Episode 132 of The Limitless Life Experience Podcast, where I talk about this subject more – you can head here.