When The New Year Doesn’t Start Well
It’s come to my attention that some people are really, really finding the beginning of this year 2023 tough, and they’re finding it tough, because they do not feel like they should feel at the beginning of the new year.
Perhaps they had a launch in December, but that didn’t go very well. And so they thought that that was going to set them up. And it didn’t. And now they’re already feeling like they were on the backfoot
Or they were going to launch in January. Ads are not working so that they are having to postpone or they’re just not feeling the vibe, nothing about money, nothing about launching nothing about nothing.
This is making them feel inadequate. And that sense of inadequacy is then compounding the feeling of “I shouldn’t feel like this right now. How is this year going to be my best year yet when this is how I’m kicking things off”.
Is it you?
If you are feeling like that right now, the first thing I want you to know is that you are not alone. The second thing that I want to say is chill the flip out.
It is more than okay, that not even halfway through January, you are not feeling all of the vibes. And the fact that you’re not feeling all of the vibes doesn’t have any bearing on what the rest of the year gets to look like for you, you can even get to the end of January.
And guess what, you’re still going to have 11 whole months to share with the world your juiciness, your fullness, your amazingness your message your philosophy, your product your services 11 whole months.
So if you are somebody who is just like, Oh, I’m not in the game yet, this is okay, stop beating yourself up.
One of the phrases that really set me free. And I share about this in my programme called Magic money is the the journal prompt,
“if what is has nothing to do with what was and you get to choose what it will be, how would you choose to feel right now? What would you choose for yourself right now.”
But to put that in very simple language, I’m basically asking myself, if today has nothing to do with yesterday. And I get to choose what today gets to mean and how I get to feel in today. How would I choose to feel? And the truth is that yesterday really has nothing to do with today. It’s only how much of yesterday that you want to bring into today that is going to determine your experience.
So like I said, you can have not just one month where you’re a bit. You could do six months of the year and then have the most incredible six months.
You could have a nightmare year, You have 11 months that are absolutely terrible. And then something shifted in month 12 in December and you are ready and raring and willing to go, absolutely possible in the world of infinite possibilities, you can make more in the December than you have for the entire year and turn your whole life and business around.
Stop doing this…
Now, obviously, that is not what we consciously desire to create. But my point is, stop bringing yesterday’s baggage into today, you don’t need it, put yourself on some new clothes, you know, wash your face, and like, decide who is showing up today.
You know, like yesterday’s version of you stay in bed. So this is the first part really know that it’s okay for you to relax. And you have got so much time to make this year, an incredible year for you.
Now, what I want you to do next is really look at the stories that you’re telling yourself about how it is that you’re feeling or what it means to be feeling the way that you are feeling right now.
And ask yourself, Is the story true? What came up? When I was asking the people in my world what the stories were It was I’m not ready? I don’t feel good enough. I feel like I’m about to fuck it all up. I just don’t have the talent. Like I’m just not cut out for this. And the question that I ask is, is this true?
Now when you’re saying things like, “I’m just not cut out for this” And then you ask yourself, is this true? Monkey mind might say, Yes, it’s true.
And here’s the thing, if you get a yes, it’s true to a question like that, what you’re really saying is, I’m out. I’m out, I’m done.
And then you get to ask yourself, is that true? Am I really out? Am I saying that I no longer want to be a business person?
- Am I saying that I really don’t think that it’s possible for me to create a course and sell a course that is going to help people?
- Is it really true that I don’t desire to be in this relationship anymore?
- Is it really true that I never think that I’m going to be able to be the person that I want to be?
- Is it really true, I just think that I don’t have it in me, and I’m never going to have it in me?
Usually the answer is no, that’s not true. Usually, the answer is I feel a little bit crappy right now. But there’s a part of me that knows that I can turn this around.
And when you are able to get to that space, or if you already know that this is a bullshit story, I’m just in my head.
What do you WANT?
When you’re in that space, you get to ask yourself, what do I want to be true? What is it that I desire to be true?
This question is so important, but it only works if you fundamentally believe that we get to create our experience of life, like how we respond to what life is giving us in the moment is going to dictate and determine our experience.
So you’re dealing with that feeling of, oh, I’m not in the place that I want to be. But if I know that I create my own experience, how do I want to respond right now? And then how do I desire to feel? So how I’m going to respond is I’m going to say enough.
And from that place, what is it that I want to create knowing I want to feel certain in my body? That I’ve got what it takes. I’ve got what it takes to get up and get on.
That’s how I desire to feel – certain certainty in my body. And you want to feel joy, I want to feel happy.
And I want to feel excited about all of the things that are possible for me this year
- about creating something magic
- about creating something new
- about engaging with new people
- about finally overcoming the money stories that have held me back
I desire to feel happy and excited.
The next step
So the next step after that is, what am I going to need to let go of in order for that to be true?
The answer to this question of ”what is it that I’m going to need to let go of” is going to be something like fear that I’m not good enough, I’m going to need to let go of the fear that I’m not good enough in order to feel certain.
I’m gonna have to let go of the fear of failure in order to be willing to take the next step.
I’m going to have to let go of the need to be right in order to really show up powerfully in this relationship and build the relationship that it is that I desire.
I’m going to have to let go of the fear of judgement in order to be the parent that I know that I want to be and that my child needs.
What is it that you’re going to need to let go of to make your desired feeling a reality?
The action piece! What would I need to DO?
This is the action piece of the faith plus action, what would I need to do in order to be one step closer to that desire?
Now, this isn’t a thinking exercise this step, it’s an actual doing exercise. So it might be that I get to forgive myself for losing my shit at my child. And so the forgiveness piece is one action point.
And then it might be that I go over and give my child a hug. And I am one step closer to being the parent, I know that it is I desire to be
In your business, maybe the first step is acknowledging that even though you desire certainty, you don’t know how this is going to turn out.
So just acknowledge and accept, that might be the first step. And then the second step is to go and make an offer, even though you don’t know how it’s going to turn out. Because you’re willing to go all in,
What are the action steps that are going to take you one step closer to realising your desire. This is your work for this week.
And the thing that underpins everything that we’ve just said, because I know that this is quite action orientated, the thing that underpins all of that is your willingness to stop being so hard on yourself, it gets to be okay.
Because if you choose to be in the game, rather than in your head, you’re going to get feedback, you’re going to learn, you’re going to shoot the shit about that with your coach with your mentor, with your mastermind group, whoever it is that you need to discuss the feedback with,
And then you’re going to take another step.